Tuesday, September 28, 2010

In the stillness You are there...

Be still my beating heart...

I feel as if I am starting to sound like a broken record...
And if that be the case, feel free to click the box in your upper right hand corner and exit.

Its hard to explain where I am... mentally, emotionally, spiritually...
I feel as if I have it all under contol most days...
But, there are plenty of days when I just feel lost.

Spiritually, I am in a much better place than I have been in a long time. My biggest struggles and downfalls don't seem to be an issue...

But I guess I feel as if that brings on a whole new set of issues in itself.
This place I am in, I know its temporary.
I know that I am not supposed to be here forever.

However, that feeling of knowing, has left me in such a place of expectancy.
Which expectancy isn't necessarily bad, it just seems that rather than patience,
my emotions take over and want to rush into any opportunity presented.

Its one thing to tell your mind to calm down, but how do you tell your heart?

I get excited, or stressed, or I start to contemplate the what ifs and possibilities, and I feel as if my heart is literally beating out of my chest.

And its a good feeling to be honest.
I haven't felt so free and well excited about possibilities in a long time.
But in the same breath, I know that I have to guard my heart.

I've been hurt, and honestly... it has sucked.

Because its soooo easy to get caught up in a dream, that you never stop to think about how to get there, or worse, if the dream doesn't work out the way you had hoped...

I am a girl.. its just the way my mind works. You give me the slightest hope, and I already have it all planned.
This hasn't always worked too well.. actually so far it hasn't worked out at all.

This morning on the way to work, i was just reminded to "Be Still and Know that I am God"
wow... sooooo the words I needed to hear.

Because its days like today when I am ready to dive into my heart's desires with out a second thought.. I feel God telling my its not the time to dive.

There are times for action and there are times to be still.

Today is a still today... and I have a pretty good feeling that I have quite a few be still days ahead of me.

But I know that in the stillness, God is preparing my heart, and preparing the dreams that are waiting for me.

So rather than get my hopes up and then crushed, its time to let go and let God. Do my part, and let Him take care of the rest.

To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven...


  1. Ummm. Quite simply. I love this. & I relate to every word ya wrote.

  2. This is one of my greatest struggles! I like to take charge and do things myself. It is so hard for me to give things to God and let him work it out. Perfect post today! Thank you Paige :)


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What is Paigerific? I’m glad you asked, although I don’t have an exact definition to offer. Paigerific is my thoughts and my heart. Paigerific is my passion and my fear. Paigerific is my success and my failures. Paigerific is my blood, sweat, and tears. Paigerific is more than just simply word. It’s a million different words all rolled into one. Words like hope, grace, determination, imperfection, love, faith, insecurity… The one word I would use to describe myself? I am Paigerific.


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