Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Esse quam videri

Be rather than appear to be....

Know what I've been doing lately? 

Absolutely nothing.

Really, I was thinking during church on Sunday about all the things I've accomplished the last few months, and nothing at all comes to mind. 

I take Liv to school, I go to work, I pick Liv up, we go home, eat dinner, take baths, and go to bed. 

Life has been terribly mundane. 

I mean, I have a right to just take it easy for a while... I've quite literally been through Hell this year, with my stroke and divorce... I deserve some time.

Absolutely and completely wrong!

I've been telling myself for the past few months... when I get out of therapy, or when I move back home, or when I can drive... then I'll start making a difference... then I'll start changing the world. But you know what? All those things have come to pass and I'm still stuck in my weekly routine. 

Maybe I'm scared or I've become lazy. Maybe the heartbreak I've experienced affects me more the I let on. Maybe I can't because I don't know how to let go. Maybe I have a million and one ideas, but I doubt that I can actually accomplish some of these goals. 

"Let our faith be more than anthems,Greater than the songs we sing"

Is our faith only anthems? Is our worship simply a song? Are our words of hope simply white noise? Do we live what we preach? Is a few minutes of extra sleep more important than time with God? Is your prime time show more valuable than a lost and dying world? 

If we don't follow our own convictions... If we don't go against our own beliefs... we are hypocrites.

Let's call it what it is. Too many Christians are content with living lukewarm lives. It's time to make a decision... it's time to make a stand. Hot or cold. 

"The world is an evil place; not because of people who are evil, but because of people who don't do anything about it." -Albert Einstein 

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What is Paigerific? I’m glad you asked, although I don’t have an exact definition to offer. Paigerific is my thoughts and my heart. Paigerific is my passion and my fear. Paigerific is my success and my failures. Paigerific is my blood, sweat, and tears. Paigerific is more than just simply word. It’s a million different words all rolled into one. Words like hope, grace, determination, imperfection, love, faith, insecurity… The one word I would use to describe myself? I am Paigerific.


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